Each November, the Church directs our thoughts to the four last things: death, judgment, heaven and hell. Death is an inevitable part of life — and of family life. As I often tell my Sunday congregation, “No one is leaving this church alive.” For husbands and fathers, spiritually preparing for your own last day brings grace to your family, both now and when the time comes.
I was a pilgrim at World Youth Day in France in 1997 when I lost my fear of death. At the tomb of St. Thérèse in Lisieux, I read an inscription from one of her final letters: “I am not dying; I’m entering into life.” At that moment, I smelled roses and knew with certitude that Thérèse was alive. Since then, by the grace of God, death has held no power over me.
Most people die as they live, so the time to become a saint is today — through frequent prayer and good works. At the end of life, however, there are a few final tasks to attend to. Make every effort to go to confession, receive anointing of the sick, and receive viaticum, your last holy Communion. A good confession at the end of life is even more important than anointing. If a priest tries to skip it, insist on it.
I once gave last rites to a non-practicing Catholic who was persuaded to receive the sacrament of reconciliation before meeting her Maker. A few days later, as her children prayed the rosary at her bedside, the ravages of age and illness melted from her face. She awoke from her coma looking like a young woman, made eye contact with each of her astonished children, then fixed her radiant gaze on a point above them and breathed her last.
Death will come, the Lord tells us, “at an hour you do not expect” (Mt 24:44). How can we prepare? First, pray the rosary daily — as we ask for the grace of a holy death with each Hail Mary. Second, make a good confession regularly — normally once a month. Finally, give your end-of-life directives to three trustworthy people, usually family members — asking that every effort be made to ensure you receive the last rites, including the apostolic pardon.
For those who are prepared, death — though it may be trying — is the beautiful moment when Our Lady and St. Joseph lead us back to God.
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FATHER JOSEPH ILLO is pastor of Star of the Sea Parish in San Francisco and a member of St. Joseph the Worker Council 16734.







