Discerning the Way to Heaven

Sept. 1, 2022

Lead your family to the communion of the Holy Trinity by strengthening your communion on earth

By Soren Johnson

Sept. 1, 2022

Soren and Ever Johnson are pictured at Trinity House Café & Market in Leesburg, Va. Photo by Christopher Le Gette

EDITOR’S NOTE: Soren and Ever Johnson, joined by their five children (ages 10-19), were among at least eight Knights of Columbus families to participate with the U.S. delegation in the 10th World Meeting of Families, held June 22-26 in Rome. This column is adapted from a presentation they made there on June 25.

THREE YEARS AGO, we felt besieged by life. Soren had been in and out of the hospital for a year with life-threatening emergencies. And during that year we also experienced the sudden death of Soren’s father and the loss of his job. Our five children were all still at home, and we knew that we urgently needed to discern our next step.

We thought back to the days when we would go on long retreats to better hear the Lord’s “still, small voice.” Now, in our home, we were surrounded by grief, uncertainty and the clamor of constant needs.

For so many families today, this experience of “crisis upon crisis” is normal. It seems impossible to find the narrow path to heaven when we are surrounded by illness, death, economic instability and worse. How can authentic discernment take place amid so much exhaustion, anxiety and brokenness?

Before we answer that question, let’s remember what discernment is for. The purpose of discernment is to prepare to live with God in heaven. And living with God means living in communion, because God’s life is one of mutual giving between the Father and Son, which brings about a creative, fruitful communion in the Holy Spirit.

This is where we can all breathe a sigh of relief. Because families are already much closer to heaven than we might think!

The truth hidden in plain sight is that the family and the Holy Trinity share a stunning similarity: Both are a “communion of persons” by virtue of the love they share. Our families, made in the image of God, are icons of the Trinity. “The Christian family,” the Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches, “is a communion of persons, a sign and image of the communion of the Father and the Son in the Holy Spirit” (2205). Rather than being distant, the dynamics of life in heaven already belong to every family.

Discernment does not require an escape from family life, a sabbatical from marriage, or a timeout from parenting. By being our very own image of God dwelling in our homes, our families are both our way to heaven and our present taste of it.

If our families are both an image of divine communion and a path to grow in it, we must evaluate our choices according to this mystical reality. Of any decision our family faces, we can ask, “Will the likely result of this decision strengthen or weaken our communion?"

Each of us makes countless small decisions every day. Should I exercise now, or help my son with his homework? Should I develop myself to be what I may think God has called me to be, or is it time for me to serve my family? The principle of communion preserves a delicate tension between each person’s development and his or her contribution to the family.

If we make these small decisions faithfully, allocating our time prudently among persons and the common good, it will be easier to discern when we come to medium-sized decisions. And if we use the principle of communion at life’s small and medium junctures, we will be ready when we arrive at big intersections: when we must decide whether to move to another town or take a new job, or how to take care of an elderly parent or a child who has just been released from rehab or prison.

Discernment that leads to greater communion with God and others is an invitation that our Lord makes to every family today, even those who feel their life is “crisis upon crisis.” If it is true, as St. John Paul II said, that “the future of humanity passes by way of the family,” then the future will also pass by the way of each family’s daily discernment as a little Trinity, a communion of persons.

*****

SOREN and EVER JOHNSON are the founders of the nonprofit ministry Trinity House Community. Soren is a member of Holy Family Council 6831 in Leesburg, Va.

Discerning the Way to Heaven

Related Articles

Marriage

The Seasons of Marriage

The Seasons of Marriage

Marriage

Advent Pilgrims

Advent Pilgrims

Marriage

Spousal Sandpaper

Spousal Sandpaper

Marriage

Iron Sharpens Marriage

Iron Sharpens Marriage

Marriage

Marriage Makes Men of Us

Marriage Makes Men of Us

Marriage

Love Bears Fruit

Love Bears Fruit

Marriage

The Bridegroom of Our Souls

The Bridegroom of Our Souls

Marriage

Where Love Rejoices

Where Love Rejoices