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class="col-article__title"> <h1 > <div class="rich-text "> The Mystery of Intimacy </div> </h1> </div> <div class="col-article__date"> <time>Sept. 1, 2024</time> </div> <div class="col-article__subtitle"> <span > <div class="rich-text "> Joy in marriage comes through the practice of charity, gratitude and trust in God’s grace </div> </span> </div> <div class="col-article__byline"> <span>By Damon and Melanie Owens</span> </div> <div class="col-article__date-mobile"> <time>Sept. 1, 2024</time> </div> <section class="col-article__featured "> <figure class="image-block-wrapper"> <picture><source srcset="https://files.kofc.org/images/assets/2024_09+For+Your+Marriage.jpg/8989cd8a979311ef9080fa2f32ec1e91?width=900&height=506" /><img src="https://files.kofc.org/images/assets/2024_09+For+Your+Marriage.jpg/8989cd8a979311ef9080fa2f32ec1e91?width=900&height=506" alt="Woman putting head on man's shoulder" loading="eager" class="img" decoding="auto" width="900" height="506" /></picture> <figcaption class="caption"> <div class="rich-text "> CNS Photo/Paul Haring </div> </figcaption> </figure> </section> <section class="col-article__content-rich-text"> <div class="score-rich-text-block default default"> <div class="content-area "> <div class="rich-text "> <p>Christian marriage is “a great mystery” rooted in Jesus and the Church (Eph 5:32). A wife beloved by her husband and a husband respected by his wife together are endowed by God with true kingdom-building power. When spouses invest the time and effort to grow continually in intimacy, they not only experience a joy-filled marriage but also participate in the Church’s saving mission.</p> <p>Because of sin, however, we have to learn <em>how</em> to nurture an intimacy unique to our marriage. This is naturally easier or harder during certain stages of married life. Seasons of desolation bring feelings of disconnectedness, while seasons of consolation help us with their gifts of openness and warmth. Thankfully, God uses both desolations and consolations to unearth deeper places in our hearts to discover and share.</p> <p>In our marriage ministry, we offer practical suggestions to foster deeper intimacy: First, take the C.A.K.E. Stay emotionally open to your spouse, even during times of conflict, by approaching them with <em>curiosity</em>, <em>appreciation</em>, <em>kindness</em>, and <em>eye contact</em>.</p> <p>Second, choose the most charitable interpretation of a situation, conflict or hurt. Finally, practice gratitude. When you’re tempted to shut down or run away or fuss and complain, stop immediately and name 10 things you’re truly grateful for about your spouse.</p> <p>Most importantly, remember that it is God who brings spouses together in this mysterious adventure of marriage. And it is he who is supplies the love, respect and intimacy our hearts crave.</p> <p style="text-align: center;">*****</p> <p>DAMON AND MELANIE OWENS are founders of Joyful Ever After. Married for 31 years, they have eight children and three grandchildren. Damon is a member of St. Patrick Council 15346 in Kennett Square, Pa.</p> </div> </div> </div> </section> </section> <section class="col-article__related-articles bg-colorExtraLightGrey"> <section class="article-card-block container"> <section class="article-card-block__title content-grid"> <h1 class="article-card-block__title__text grid-col-full text-left">Related Articles</h1> </section> <section class="article-card-block__cards content-grid"> <div class="article-card"> <div class="article-card__image"> <a href="/family/marriage/2026/01/the-seasons--of-marriage/"> <picture><source srcset="https://files.kofc.org/images/assets/Snow+on+a+sunny+day.jpg/Zz0zZjhjYWQzMGVjMGUxMWYwYmZlM2I2MGE3OWUyZjUwNw==?width=318&height=212" /><img src="https://files.kofc.org/images/assets/Snow+on+a+sunny+day.jpg/Zz0zZjhjYWQzMGVjMGUxMWYwYmZlM2I2MGE3OWUyZjUwNw==?width=318&height=212" alt="aphrodite74 / E+ via Getty Images" loading="lazy" decoding="auto" width="318" height="212" /></picture> </a> </div> <div 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<div class="article-card__details__category"> <a href="/family/marriage/"> <h3>Marriage</h3> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/07/marriage-makes-men-of-us/> <h2>Marriage Makes Men of Us</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title-mobile"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/07/marriage-makes-men-of-us/> <h2>Marriage Makes Men of Us</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__by-line"> <p>By Joseph Pearce</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser"> <p>The measure of true manhood lies in the willingness to give up one’s life out of love </p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser-mobile"> <p>The measure of true manhood lies in the willingness to give up one’s life out of love </p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="article-card"> <div class="article-card__image"> <a href="/family/marriage/2025/06/love-bears-fruit/"> <picture><source srcset="https://images3.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/DomesticChurch_ForYourMarriage.jpg/Zz03ZmVmMzcyNjNjYTUxMWYwOGY4ZDZhYzZjZTU4NDI4Ng==?width=318&height=212" /><img src="https://images3.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/DomesticChurch_ForYourMarriage.jpg/Zz03ZmVmMzcyNjNjYTUxMWYwOGY4ZDZhYzZjZTU4NDI4Ng==?width=318&height=212" alt="DomesticChurch_ForYourMarriage.jpg" loading="lazy" decoding="auto" width="318" height="212" /></picture> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details"> <div class="article-card__details__category"> <a href="/family/marriage/"> <h3>Marriage</h3> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/06/love-bears-fruit/> <h2>Love Bears Fruit</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title-mobile"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/06/love-bears-fruit/> <h2>Love Bears Fruit</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__by-line"> <p>By Leigh and Carter Snead</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser"> <p>Carrying the cross of infertility with Christ can become a path to unexpected gifts</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser-mobile"> <p>Carrying the cross of infertility with Christ can become a path to unexpected gifts</p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="article-card"> <div class="article-card__image"> <a href="/family/marriage/2025/05/the-bridegroom-of-our-souls/"> <picture><source srcset="https://images4.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/Wedding+at+Cana/Zz1iYWUwMTM1ODQ4NWYxMWYwOTU5NGUyNGVkYTlhYjhmMw==?width=318&height=212" /><img src="https://images4.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/Wedding+at+Cana/Zz1iYWUwMTM1ODQ4NWYxMWYwOTU5NGUyNGVkYTlhYjhmMw==?width=318&height=212" alt="Wedding at Cana" loading="lazy" decoding="auto" width="318" height="212" /></picture> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details"> <div class="article-card__details__category"> <a href="/family/marriage/"> <h3>Marriage</h3> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/05/the-bridegroom-of-our-souls/> <h2>The Bridegroom of Our Souls</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title-mobile"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/05/the-bridegroom-of-our-souls/> <h2>The Bridegroom of Our Souls</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__by-line"> <p>By John Cuddeback</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser"> <p>In the sacrament of marriage, we are called to be a living sign of Christ’s love for the Church</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser-mobile"> <p>In the sacrament of marriage, we are called to be a living sign of Christ’s love for the Church</p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="article-card"> <div class="article-card__image"> <a href="/family/marriage/2025/04/where-love-rejoicespage/"> <picture><source srcset="https://images4.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/April2025_DomesticChurch_Marriage/Zz03ODM4YjRkZTNkOTExMWYwOGNhYzIyMmU4NjJjOGJmYg==?width=318&height=212" /><img src="https://images4.cmp.optimizely.com/assets/April2025_DomesticChurch_Marriage/Zz03ODM4YjRkZTNkOTExMWYwOGNhYzIyMmU4NjJjOGJmYg==?width=318&height=212" alt="Smiling woman hugging her husband on the couch from behind in the living room" loading="lazy" decoding="auto" width="318" height="212" /></picture> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details"> <div class="article-card__details__category"> <a href="/family/marriage/"> <h3>Marriage</h3> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/04/where-love-rejoicespage/> <h2>Where Love Rejoices</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__title-mobile"> <a href=/family/marriage/2025/04/where-love-rejoicespage/> <h2>Where Love Rejoices</h2> </a> </div> <div class="article-card__details__by-line"> <p>By Rolando Moreno</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser"> <p>A strong marriage requires that we intentionally cultivate a loving relationship with our spouse</p> </div> <div class="article-card__details__teaser-mobile"> <p>A strong marriage requires that we intentionally cultivate a loving relationship with our spouse</p> </div> </div> </div> </section> </section> </section> </main> <div class="jump-to-top-btn"> <button type="button" class="scrollToTopBtn"> <svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-labelledby="backToTopTitle backToTopDesc"> <title id="backToTopTitle">Back to top</title> <desc id="backToTopDesc">Click here to scroll back to the top</desc> <circle cx="11" cy="11" r="11" transform="translate(1 1)" fill="#fff" opacity="0.65" /> <g transform="translate(0.375 0.399)"> <g> <path d="M0,11.8A11.8,11.8,0,1,1,11.8,23.6,11.814,11.814,0,0,1,0,11.8m21.529,0A9.728,9.728,0,1,0,11.8,21.528,9.739,9.739,0,0,0,21.529,11.8" transform="translate(0 0)" fill="#626161" /> <path d="M14.648,27.369l6.579-6.579,6.579,6.579L26.34,28.834l-5.113-5.113-5.113,5.113Z" 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