The Bridegroom of Our Souls

May 1, 2025

In the sacrament of marriage, we are called to be a living sign of Christ’s love for the Church

By John Cuddeback

May 1, 2025

Wedding at Cana — The Marriage Feast at Cana, c. 1665-75, by Bartolomé Esteban Murillo / Barber Institute of Fine Arts / Bridgeman Images

“Christ is the true groom of the soul.” These words of St. Thomas Aquinas, from his commentary on the Gospel of John, express a truth at the heart of our faith and what is at stake in matrimony. My marriage should reveal — to my spouse, to me, to my children, and to many others — the relationship Christ seeks with us. “For your husband is your Maker, the Lord of hosts is his name” (Is 54:5).

What an astounding revelation! Who would have dared imagine the Lord of hosts as one’s spouse! The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches, “The entire Christian life bears the mark of the spousal love of Christ and the Church” (1617, cf. Eph 5:26-27). But wait. If this is true, then how we experience spousal love — whether in our own marriage, our parents, or those around us — directly affects our perception of the entire Christian life.

This is central in God’s plan for marriage. Indeed, as a sacrament, marriage is designed precisely for this end — to be a sign of how Christ loves each soul. When I first heard someone say “the best thing you can do for your children is to love your wife well,” it struck me like a thunderbolt, leaving me both thrilled and terrified. Now I can understand better why.

My efforts and struggles to be a good husband, to love my wife well, should be a natural (while imperfect!) mirror of God’s love. We often hear that as parents we reveal how God is a father. But first in our marriage, perhaps and even especially in persevering through daily trials, we reveal something of how God is a groom — the true groom of every soul.

*****

JOHN CUDDEBACK is an author, founder of LifeCraft, and professor of philosophy at Christendom College in Front Royal, Va., where he is a member of John Carrell Jenkins Council 7771. He and his wife, Sofia, have six children.

The Bridegroom of Our Souls

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